


Saitama Hates Supergirl

by kenchang



Series: Supergirl and Saitama A Love Story [4]
Category: Supergirl (Comics), ワンパンマン | One-Punch Man
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-01
Updated: 2018-10-01
Packaged: 2019-07-21 01:15:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16149476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kenchang/pseuds/kenchang
Summary: Don't you just hate it when your crush falls for your cool best friend? Saitama sure does.





	Saitama Hates Supergirl

**Author's Note:**

> Just wrote this for fun, so don't expect much accuracy.

Genos, the young, handsome, golden haired superhero known as the Demon Cyborg, scans the crime scene when his phone starts vibrating.

"Yes, Master Saitama," he answers.

"Hey, Genos!", Saitama greets him from the other line. "You busy?"

"Actually, yes. The Superhero Association assigned me to a new case. You may have seen it on the news. It's about the string of ritualistic murders-"

"OK, you know what? I was just being polite earlier. I didn't actually want to know what you were busy with. Look, I need your help with something."

"Of course, Master Saitama. Whatever you need."

"I'm going to get married and have ten beautiful, bald boys and girls with this hot alien super heroine."

"Oh really? Congratulations."

"Thanks. She doesn't know yet, though."

Genos' brow furrows. "Your bride is not aware of her own wedding?"

"Exactly! See, I gotta help her defeat this Demon Lady first. Then I'm gonna hang up the cape for good."

Genos frowns and worriedly asks, "You're retiring from the Superhero Association? Master, are you sure?"

Saitama smiles, daydreaming about his future with Supergirl again. "Genos, I've never been more sure of anything else in my life."

#

"You're gonna love this guy," Saitama tells Supergirl on their way to a small eatery in the city. "Genos used to be my roommate. Well, until he became this big time superhero, that is."

"He can help us locate Demon Lady?", Supergirl asks.

"Oh, yea. This guy's smart. If anyone can find this Demon Lady, it's Genos."

Supergirl smiles. "It sounds like you two are best friends."

"Yea, I guess," Saitama answers, reminiscing about past adventures with his old friend. "Oh, there he is!"

Genos puts down his tea, and stands to greet them. "Master Saitama!", he calls, beckoning them to the table.

"Supergirl, this is Genos. Genos, Supergirl," Saitama makes introductions.

Genos bows politely, but Supergirl just stares at him in astonishment as if hypnotized and says, "God, you're cute."

"Oh shit!", Saitama shrieks inwardly. "I've made a terrible mistake! Of course she'll fall in love with him. All the women do. What the hell was I thinking?!"

"Thank you," Genos responds matter-of-factly to Supergirl's compliment. Then he gestures them to their seats, with Supergirl intercepting Saitama for the seat next to the Demon Cyborg. Genos signals a waiter, and goes straight to the point. "I understand you need my help tracking down a notorious super villainess named Demon Lady."

"Who?", Supergirl asks, still dreamily staring at the cyborg.

"Demon Lady!", Saitama irritably reminds her. "You know, the super powerful villainess from a hell dimension who killed a bunch of your friends."

"Oh, they weren't really my friends. I hardly knew them," Supergirl replies dismissively before turning her attention back to the cyborg. "So, Genos. I'm told that you're kind of a prodigy in the Superhero Association. A celebrity. What's that like?"

"HEY, CAN WE GET SOME DAMN SERVICE OVER HERE ALREADY?!", Saitama shouts.

"In a moment, sir," the waiter replies.

Genos produces an envelope and places it on the table. "Master Saitama, this is all the information I could find on Demon Lady," he says. "It appears that she might be involved in the case I'm working on. There have been similar ritualistic murders perpetrated by the very Satanic occult that set her free in America-."

"Why do you call Mr. Saitama master?", Supergirl asks.

Saitama sees this as an opportunity to one up Genos and brags, "Genos here is my disciple! I taught him everything he knows!"

Supergirl inches her chair closer to the cyborg and says, "Wow, Genos. You're so humble."

"Ugh! I give up!", Saitama tells himself, throwing his hands in the air.

Genos sees something in the corner of his eye. "Look out!", he shouts, suddenly tackling Supergirl and Saitama out of the way, just as a giant broadsword splits their table in two!

The assailant is a ten foot tall man, heavily armored from head to toe. The staff and patrons of the eatery scream in panic and run for their lives.

"Well, that was rude," Saitama comments. "He didn't even introduce himself first."

"That's because he's from my country," Supergirl explains. "That's Demon Knave. He's Demon Lady's strongest follower."

"Hey, Genos. Don't they call you Demon Cyborg? Maybe you should be working with these guys," Saitama jokes. "OK, yea. That wasn't funny at all."

"I came here to destroy the cyborg hero snooping around in our affairs," Demon Knave informs them. "Killing Supergirl at the same time would be a much welcome bonus."

"What about me?", Saitama asks. "You have no idea who I am, do you?"

"You? Hah! You're just collateral damage."

"Master, leave him to me!", Genos declares, and launches himself towards the super villain.

Demon Knave swings his great sword at the rushing cyborg. Genos somersaults over the attack and kicks the giant's face in midair, knocking his enemy off balance.

"INCINERATE!", the Demon Cyborg growls.

A stream of fire erupts from his palm, completely engulfing Demon Knave in flames!

"So cool!", Supergirl lauds, her hands clasped together to Saitama's chagrin.

"Huh?", Genos utters when he sees movement within the flames.

Demon Knave steps out of the blaze and swats Genos away with his mighty blade!

"My armor is protected by my mistress' black magic!", the villain arrogantly announces. "Mere technology is no match for it!"

Genos is sent rolling across the ground, one of his robotic arms severed.

"Genos!", Supergirl shouts worriedly and rushes to him.

Saitama is likewise concerned, but he knows that his friend has survived much worse. So he instead focuses on Demon Knave. The hero's fists clench. His eyes blaze with fury.

"Now, it's your turn," the armored titan tells him. "Then the alien."

Demon Knave swings his massive sword down on his opponent. Saitama shields himself, and the great blade shatters against his forearm like glass!

"What-?!", Demon Knave reacts, as he stares in shock at what is left of his once mighty weapon.

Saitama leans forward and thrusts his fist right through the magic armor's chest plate! When he pulls his arm back out, blood sprays from Demon Knave's wound like a fountain. The giant falls heavily to his knees.

"You are strong, little man," the villain groans, as he bleeds to death. "But you are no match for my mistress. Demon Lady will crush you like-" He starts coughing blood. "No! Not like this. Please don't let me die on my knees."

Saitama takes a step forward and shoves Demon Knave back with his boot.

"There," the bald hero angrily says. "Now, you can die on your ass."

"You asshole," the villain grumbles. His head droops. His broad shoulders slacken. His eyes lose their glow. And Demon Knave dies.

"Well, that takes care of that," Saitama proudly announces, shaking the blood off his glove. "Hope Supergirl was impressed."

Except when he turns, he realizes that the heroine didn't even notice.

"Oh Genos," Supergirl whimpers, as she cradles the Demon Cyborg's head on her lap.

Saitama sighs resignedly. Then he calls out, "You OK there, Genos?!"

"I'll live," Genos mumbles weakly.

#

Back at the apartment, Supergirl asks, "Mr. Saitama, how do I get Genos to like me?" She might as well have stabbed him through his invulnerable heart. "I mean, the men of your country seem very different from the men in mine."

"This must be what it felt like for Demon Knave when I punched him through the chest," Saitama thinks miserably. He forces himself to smile and says, "Sorry, kiddo. I'm no good at that romance thing. But good luck."

#

"I'm sorry," Genos rejects Supergirl's offer, when she finally manages to steel herself and asks him out for coffee the following night. "I am afraid this case I'm working on for the Superhero Association takes all of my time."

Aside from the heartache, Supergirl realizes that she had allowed herself to be distracted, and she feels a twinge of guilt.

"People are dying. I'm a super heroine. They're counting on me," she thinks. Then she smiles at Genos and bravely says, "Good luck with the case, Demon Cyborg. We'll bring Demon Lady down together!"

Genos nods politely. Then he turns and walks away.

END

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
